You might think that the majority of guys you come across on these sites are going to be obese, socially awkward guys who are too lazy to actually go out into the world and meet someone. Instead, I’ve found the reality of this to be the complete opposite.
I know this is something you would think to be a given for a guy on a dating site considering he dished out the money and time to join the site in the first place, but that’s not always the case.
These guys are pretty harmless, they’ll follow all the site prompts to talk to you but never show interest in wanting to actually meet-up.
The reality of this is that the chances of this happy-ever-after happening to you are very slim. I have been using online dating sites (I won’t point out which ones) for a little over a year now and have realized that they need some serious debunking.
** I'd like to note here that I wrote this article in January of 2013 - I've now completely given up on dating sites. **
Here are a few of the most commonly accepted views towards online dating that I think need a reality-check:
Just because he’s on a dating site doesn’t mean he’s lazy.
Most of the guys you come across are so into keeping physically fit that they don’t have the time to go out and meet people. They’re so focused on their appearance and their huge ego that they don’t take the time to go out, socialize, and be ‘normal.’ The result of this is that if you actually get to meet one of these guys in person for a date it will be difficult to find a time that suits them because they are at the gym whenever they aren’t at work (and forget about Saturday nights, that precious male-bonding time means the world to them – as if they haven’t spent enough time with their buddies at the gym all week,) and they will be lame in conversation because the only thing they have to talk about is how much they benched this week and blah, blah, blah.
Sorting through the endless profiles that list ‘keeping physically fit’ as a passion can be tedious to say the least.
Note: I don’t have anything against keeping healthy and exercising and all that, but when it becomes an odd obsession that takes over all aspects of your life, that’s a bit much.
Just because he’s on a dating site doesn’t mean he’s willing/ready to commit.
A lot of guys sign up because they don’t really know what they want. They see all of their friends pairing up, getting married, having kids, etc. and they figure they should do the same, even though they might not be ready yet. They figure online is the best way to meet someone because at least they can say they’re making an effort to find someone to settle down with, but it’s not really what they’re looking for.
Just because he’s on a dating site doesn’t mean he’s got it all together – Mr. Desperate.
The reality of these sites is that sometimes you meet a Mr. Desperate. Mr. Desperate will go through the online communication portion of the ‘meeting stage’ with you rather quickly, and will have no hesitation in asking you out for the next evening.
In my experience, Mr. Desperate is the kind of guy who’s willing to be with any woman. You don’t even need to have that much in common, or enjoy your date. This guy will assuredly text you that same evening as your date letting you know how amazing you are and what a great time he had even though you awkwardly sat there for two hours twiddling your thumbs and trying the think of things to talk about with this creature, and two vodka and cranberries later you’re so desperate as to fake a sick grandma call to get out of the date.
Mr. Desperate is usually fresh out of a long-term relationship and just afraid of facing the realities of the single world and being the big, scary ‘A’ word… Alone! So, don’t be too harsh on this guy, let him down easy. Just explain to him that you two can keep it friendly but the compatibility just isn’t there for any kind of intimate relationship.
So ladies, when signing up for a dating site, don’t set your sights to high and go into it without any expectations. If you happen to meet your Mr. Right, then good for you! But don’t expect that just because you’ve dished out your dollars and spent countless hours perfecting your profile, that you’re going to find your prince charming. If anything, online dating is great for getting some dating experience and learning what you want/don’t want in a special someone.
It’s all about the experience. Never settle for less than butterflies, and never forget how wonderful you are!
No comments:
Post a Comment